Being surrounded by the constant pressure that society/the media puts on us as women, to get our “pre-baby body” back is exhausting.
Even just standing in the line at the grocery store, we can’t escape headlines like “How she got her body back!”, “In a bikini, just 3 months after baby!”, “Back to her pre-baby weight!”.
I used to think that’s what I wanted. I wanted to snap my fingers and go back to the body that didn’t have stretch marks and cellulite. I would look at pictures from when I got married and think, “Wouldn’t that be nice? Dang, I looked so good back then.”
But then came the babies. One in 2012 and another in 2014. And everything changes.
The stomach that used to be flat, becomes the one that is still “puffy” a year (or two, or three) after the baby arrives.
Those ta-ta’s that used to sit up high and fit perfectly into a “B” cup are now in a DDD nursing bra – and leaking everywhere.
That skin that used to be tight and smooth is now loose and contains lots of “tiger stripes”.
I remember hearing about someone who had gotten their “girls” enhanced (if you know what I mean 😉 ) – around the same time that I had just birthed a baby and was trying desperately to learn how to breastfeed with my new milk-filled “additions”. I BROKE DOWN in tears to my husband. Was I hormonal? Disheartened? Jealous of this person? I think it was a mix of all three.
For the first 6 months after having Bronson, I felt like I was quite literally having an “out of body” experience. Like, “Who’s body is this, and where did mine go?”
Then came the second pregnancy and along came Mav. Along with our new little precious punkin came more stretch marks, more weight, more self-hate talk (in my head) while standing in front of the mirror – and less and less motivation to do anything to change.
Then I joined my first accountability group.
I had seen my friend’s results from doing some “21 Day Fix” thingy and I decided to reach out to her. She got me all set up with the program and put me in what was called an accountability group. It was a private, online Facebook group with girls all doing 21 Day Fix, as well. Every day we had to check-in and show that we did our workout and that we were on track with the eating program.
I hated the first month. I would CRINGE thinking about doing my workouts everyday. I’d want to lash out in a jealous rage when everyone around me was eating McDonalds and there I was, measuring out my “clean eating” foods in my color coated containers.
But I bit the bullet and kept going.
By the second month, I was hooked. The workouts had given me a new sense of strength and discipline. Instead of dreading them, a switched had flipped and I couldn’t WAIT to press play on that DVD player every morning. The accountability and the LOVE of the coaches and the girls in the groups (who all had the same struggles as I did, go figure!) kept me pushing through every day. I felt relaxed every day after I had done my 30 minute workout and every area of my life started to improve – from my temperament as a parent, to my self esteem as a woman.
By the third month, it had become my lifestyle. I became a coach and started sharing this incredible new journey with my family and friends. I could NOT get enough of this community of girls and coaches who all wanted the same thing. Health. Not skinny-ness. Not to fit into a size 2 pair of jeans. They all wanted to be HEALTHY. And I did too.
My body has accomplished more in the last 11 months than I could have ever imagined.
First of all, the fact that this “new” body carried and birthed TWO human beings is pretty incredible. These days I can feel muscles working that I didn’t know I had. I can lift both of my boys at the same time. I can chase the kids around the park and not feel winded. My husband and I just recently moved ALL of our furniture from one house to another….just the 2 of us (who needs to call their buddies for help, when your wife lifts weights? 😉 ).
I may look curvier – but I’m in better shape now, than I was on our wedding day. Booya.
Mentally, I am more disciplined than I’ve ever been. I figure, if I can make time for a 30 minute workout, 6 days a week, I can make time for lots of other things that I had been previously too lazy to do (ouch!). I’ve started my own business and decided to pay it forward by helping other women and mommies see that they too can CHOOSE to be healthy and strong.
How much do I weigh? Who knows. I don’t weigh myself anymore. Plus, muscle is more of my jam.
What size jeans do I wear? What ever size/brand feels GOOD on my body. Numbers are just numbers.
Did I wear a bikini while on vacation with my family…stretch marks, loose skin, cellulite and all? You betcha.
So the answer for me personally, is NO. I don’t want my pre-baby body back.
I’ll take this one, any day of the week.